Tommee Tipps

We all know that it’s nice to buy gifts for expectant parents and their babies, but there’s a whole host of other ways you can help as well...

How to Support a Friend Who's Just Become a Mom

So, your bestie’s pregnant and about to become a mom, how exciting!

We all know that it’s nice to buy gifts for expectant parents and their babies, but there’s a whole host of other ways you can help (before and once the little one has arrived) that don’t cost a thing.

Offer to help

Becoming a parent doesn’t mean that the world stops, there’s still grocery shopping to be done, meals to cook, rooms to tidy and general everyday tasks to be completed. Why not ask your friend if you can lend a hand with the cleaning, do the washing up, or prepare some food while she gets some well-deserved rest.

Remind them that social media isn’t real life

We all know how easy it is to get sucked into social media, and new moms are not immune to this! Make sure that your friend isn’t comparing herself to the so called ‘perfect’ posts she’s sees online. To counteract any doom-scrolling blues, you could share body-positive pages or funny videos to brighten her day, or pass on a book that you’ve loved for her to read.

Make sure she takes time for herself

Once the baby has arrived and if your friend feels comfortable being apart from her little one, you could offer to look after him or her for an hour or two to give them a break. Suggest that she catches up on some sleep, gets her hair done or goes for a postpartum massage while you take the baby out for a walk. If your friend has older children, you could offer to take them to the park or cinema for a few hours to give mom and the new baby time to bond one-to-one.

Encourage her to seek help if it’s needed

You know your friend better than anyone, so keep an eye on her. If it seems like she’s struggling, let her know that you’re always there for a chat or to lend a hand. You can point them in the direction of professional help and make sure that they know they’re not alone.

We’ve listed some great organisations below as a starting point…

Spend time together

Make sure to schedule in time for the two of you to go out or catch up over the phone like you did before the baby arrived on the scene. It can be tricky for new mom’s to leave to house at first, so be patient. Whether you share laughter and tears, or coffee and cake, it will remind your bestie of who she was – and still is – and give her a breather from the world of feeds, diapers, and night-time routines!

Remind her that she’s amazing

Sometimes new mom’s need a reminder that they’re real-life wonder women! Be sure to point out moments when your pal has aced new-motherhood. It’s also a great idea to snap some candid shots that capture the bond between her and her baby and send them to her as a reminder of what a good mom she is.

If this content reminds you of your own experiences or makes you think of someone you know and you feel concerned or uncomfortable, please head to the PSI website for information about perinatal mental health resources that may be able to help.